Shes gone to therapy, but currently not going. She might miss you. I only have time to look at primary materials and not much more, and sometimes I wait until she has gone to sleep so I can read in peace. Ive never been so stressed and sad and angry my whole life. Next time you feel like this world is messed, go outside and try something new. If I go out without my phone I will find I have around 20-30 messages when I get back all telling me how selfish I am for ignoring her. Lately she has been responding to me uncaringly and uninterested. She no. By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our. First two years went well. Every time I look at her pics, I am immediately in love again by seeing her smile but in person all I am thinking of is an exit strategy despite all the caring in the world. The medications side effect is sex blocking, also with her off alcohol her mind cant deal with emotions as other people, so basicly we had like 3 times sex this year. Also, it is very important that a psychiatrist, and not a general practitioner, be managing her medication. You're looking older but you can't be certain. she knows im here for her. Giving a quick comeback or getting angry will reinforce his behavior. All efforts made on my part were in vain. Wow.. so many people with so many similar issues and I thought I was the only one! The fact that shes still hanging around him enforces that theyve cheated. She was not like this when we first met. Medication treats symptoms, but it doesnt address all of the problems that often underlie depression. Unfortunately, there seems to be nothing I can do when she feels down. She doesnt want to leave me either, because if she does she says she will kill herself. It was a no-win situation for me. If you have depression or anxiety its because you know deep in your soul that you arent on the right path or living up to your potential. I used to be able to help her cheer up and have a good time with her whenever she was sad but now,I cant do anything without getting an attitude from her or saying something stupid. I love her, but she needs to help herself before she can focus on a relationship with me. Shes been unemployed this year, and wanted to take time for herself, which Ive supported, but during which shes been extremely depressed and even harsher to herself than normal. Leave. Help me drag the camping gear down the hill. She didnt even try to make the effort in keeping the conversation going and Im always the one who care about her when she doesnt give a thought about me and keep immersing herself in her depressive world. SO IF YOU HANG AROUND PEOPLE LIKE THIS YOU WILL TAKE ON THEIR THINKING AND HABITS MAKE NO MISTAKE ABOUT IT. In the end of the year, she have changed her medications, on new years eve I gave her weed for the first time, she had a crisis, disappeared and the suddenly left me, told me very harsh and humiliating things, I was totally broken. She thinks I must be sleeping with someone else & she is not the object of my desire. I did every single thing that you guys have written here. She shut me off completely and gave me halfhearted reply whenever I talk to her. She doesnt like it when I do my own thing or want to go out or have something in my life other than her. But you're dragging me down, down, down, down. She experienced child sexual trauma and suffers from depression and ptsd. About me and my girlfriend! She might even need help to physically move some of the bigger items out (like a couch). "Relationships characterized by constant conflict, fighting, and lack of forgiveness are a recipe for disaster," Opperman says. It may be subtle behaviors such as never showing an interest in you or socializing with your friends, or it could be outright insults that damage your sense of self-worth. I always stopped everything to help her, to stay hours remind her how she is incredible. Friends are pretty intuitive in that they know immediately when something isn't right. About me and my girlfriend! Hi Greg, If things aren't going well, if there's a lack trust, or if you don't feel secure, then it makes sense that anxiety might become an issue. She has to take control of her own mind if she ever wants to get better. It bothers me a lot and Ive done all I could to understand. I am opinionated and very understanding. He started changing we had an argument one time and he cut all way from his wrist to his elbow, I couldnt leave him I had to ditch my mam to see if he was okay before he went to work. She cannot afford therapy. Everything is my fault according to her. I know she deals with her own issues and Ive known for quite some time, but I see it more often now. I always tell her I enjoy how she is my first thought when i wake up and the last. "My problem is that since we have moved in together, she is negative about everything." My girlfriend and I have been together for three years. So both of you can benefit. When we first met she experienced severe triggers and dissociative states, which led to her being unable to finish her degree, something she carries a great deal of shame from. First two years went well. Method 1 Addressing It Right Now 1 Avoid reacting immediately. Im sick of having nothing in my life matter. If the answer is yes, talk with your partner ASAP. When someone puts you down, deal with it by not immediately reacting to him. When that happens, it may be time for some serious reflection. I feel as much like a caretaker as I do a boyfriend. but in the end in realtionships, its about being happy. Im so tired now and giving her space and to myself too while figuring what I should do, to stay or leave? Do a "deep search" instead. And that one is difficult for boys: you HAVE to not think through your ego. I have a battle on my hands, life has tried to tear me down before and I wont let it just yet..You choose to be happy, Woah that is one crazy situation both of you are dealing with. I didt wanted help, I didnt wanted to tell people how sad I am (and that I dont know why) to anyone. Best of luck to you on your journey. It's an affect that's truly worth noting. Am I codependent? The act of moving things out can be difficult to deal with. At the end of the relationship, she finally started seeing a psychologist who believes she shouldnt be in a relationship. Your story is pretty much identical to mine. Basically, she pretty frequently attends fancy. Please keep in mind that GoodTherapy.org is an exclusive directory. She is loyal and would care for me no matter what but I cant keep bringing my own life down too to be on her level. Thinking that you will solve the problem will only make you more and more frustrated. and the thing with sex: if you are curious and want to understand: its comforting to know that other couples go through the same things. Can we all agree that that sounds pretty amazing, and most definitely "good? Shes not able to be there for me. Thank you for sharing. (Not married) Therapy and meds nothing will work. Not cool. So are yours always casting concerned looks? Even if you haven't done anything wrong, your partner has a way of making you feel bad. I am trying to help her but I could not help anymore than this.i could not concentrate on caring myself, could not eat or sleep well. Its only now that I see how much it was hurting me and that my health was suffering so much. For the potential cheating part, dont worry about it. I looked it up. Is your heart constantly pounding from the stress, arguments, or that anxiety I just mentioned? This is the person who wants what you have - your charm, your wit, your success, your intelligence, your job, your partner, whatever - and because they don't think they . But when you have a hobby, do make sure that you are always there for her when she needs you. all of our arguments come from her depression and her being in a bad mood, i can only sometimes cheer her up. i fell as if i cant help her, im not good enough to make her happy although i try so hard and its making me doubt myself more and more. There are so ways people find happiness and you guys both just need to find yours and you need to know that one day.. You will. Being active/yoga, eating healthy and drinking lots of water can help a lot a lot. Over the past year I dated someone that was unbalanced and going through a significant life transition. Tell her its either you or the ex, no friendships either. Its one thing to be committed to someone and another to keep trying only to see they themselves keep failing back into the same pattern. of each person. Youve managed to take care of your girlfriend and remain connected enough to yourself to come up with these questions. Sorry if I sound morbid but its devastating. So that he loves himself. She has been alcoholic for 10 years. Smoking and drinking! She has lost sleep all night, and so did I. It pisses me off. She did take medications she did try psychiatrist. Do something romantic. I have been dating my girlfriend for almost two years. It may be time to step back and focus on yourself. Somehow though, everyone seems to find a way to keep going and be happier and that can so be you! Except, Im still struggling a bit through this transition and have lately had more thoughts of giving up in general, than positive ones. Get yourself some therapy to deal with the hurt and pain, then move on with your life. I came over this weekend, she didnt seem to be too excited, she made me dinner but kept glancing at her phone, this hurt because she made less effort to communicate with me get she was on her phone more than usual. I am really surprised to see that there is so many cases of difficult relationships, and also that persons who write here are mostly guys dealing with broken girlfriends. Atlast I hate the word LOVE with cry. Send a package with love letters or get some flowers delivered to her house. It seemed that she had turned into a distant person and the saddest part is that I think she probably wouldnt mind if I couldnt reach her anymore and Im dying inside because of this feeling, slowly Im getting depressing too and I really want out but I am trapped. When I have some me time to save my soul from drowning because of her, she said that I was selfish for leaving her for, like, a day! We all have to remain positive people. Psychiatrists are the experts in the medical treatment of depression, and they will be able to provide better care than a general practitioner. We used to talk all day, have very long calls every night, laugh a lot, play together. I feel for all of you guys! Shes 30, Im 26, she never had a boyfriend, nor had sex or drugs nor anything. Gently but strongly. I am now self harming and am depressed myself and still having to work 3 jobs I am now going to see a Councillor I can ill afford and I have no one to say dont go to work I will look after you. ! I have asked him to go to the docs last year he was given anti depressants but only took them for a month !!!! A key sign of depression from relationships is low self-esteem because your partner puts you down or makes you feel bad about yourself. She was sweet, sensitive and caring. Some people need to just help themselves. she is unhappy with dating. I have good days and bad days. Everyday is a battle. She might be craving for you to cross the distance. (You're so tired) But you just can't sleep. There are so many ways a relationship can be unhealthy, and therefore so many ways it can drag you down. See what I mean? Girls love that kind of crap and its not gay or anything if you do something where you express your feelings. Like you rejecting the last possible form of understanding and connection. I can know no one would have got solution. But I feel so guilty and ashamed and like a failure for wanting this and I dont know what to do. Its a positive sign that you seem to have a solid sense not only of where she is, but also where you are. Slowly Im staying more time at home. Also, if her depression has lasted for years with no improvement, it might be time to look at changing the treatment plan. Im having this problem with my depressed gf too who I have been in a relationship with for almost 6 months now but lately, she changed from being caring to cold and selfish and I didnt do anything to anger her and treated her wth utmost care and lots of love since the beginning of our relationship. We had a lot of fun together and while she did have some mental health issues, it never caused too many problems. Im in a similar situation & it is making me crumble emotionally. Maybe she doesnt want to tell you how much she wants you to be with her because she doesnt want to appear needy. My girlfriend has been depressed for a number of years, unable to shake feelings of sadness and hopelessness that carry. Dear Armand, And he just feels like a failure and a burden onto everyone else to the point he has almost committed suicide twice. There must be fond memories. The couple times I have plucked up the courage to leave she has done drastic forms of self harm. First, try and make an attempt to be supportive. I feel like a slave. Ive been going to therapy for 3 years and talking about my problems doesnt help me. my health is declining. Is it over? Here are 10 who are holding you down. And it can be anything, anything for the wide spectre of psychological problems or disorders. She clearly doesnt love you like one should love another person. Stress can cause all sorts of problems. They take all the goodness from you and leave you with nothing but sadness and depression. (Not married) The specific mention of medication but not therapy makes me wonder whether your girlfriend is in therapy. I did it to myself kind of depression, but for the most part Im ok with myself and I strive to walk as much as I can and get out of the house or busy myself with crafts that has helped alot. She still will randomly text me I love you! The odd time but the girl I felt secure with seems to have left her conscience. But enough about me, what I suggest youd do is get a hobby, or something to distract you from thinking about her all the time. And that is the hard and painful task to face the truth, because depression is, for me at least running away form truth, avoiding to face it. Setup Type: Offline Installer / Full Standalone Setup. Let her take the step and compliment her if she completes it. So I tried communicating a little more and making plans. Should I just except it and appreciate the five minutes we talk a day? She just dont know how to do this. Long distance, depressed girlfriend, university, feeling trapped, spending too much time and sacrificing too many things for the happiness of the other person in the relationship. My suggestion is start having a quality of life before it is to late , love is wonderful when it is growing but it can be hell if it is one sided. The reason I feel it's dragging me down is that my girlfriend's mother has always been extremely disrespectful to me. As men we dont have an option. AND finally, when everything feels fine, she doesnt acknowledge anything that happened. This girl was everything I wanted, such a good partner, listener, so smart, sensitive. Then she started talking that her family pressured her, about the meds and that she loved me, but had a really hard time. We kept going on, and little by little she started becoming more and more away from me. So its what you make of it. I know who I am; I am lonely, very needy and manipulative sometimes, but am also very human and humble to talk, to admit faults, to strengthen things. Can anyone help me and tell me what can i do?. She did not want to fight, and when I thought finally thing would become better, she just said that she did not have time or energy to focus on the relationship, and wanted to focus on herself. I dont want to get to the point of carer for her or to resent her because of her condition. If you haven't been feeling like yourself lately, your romance may be to blame. It is very sad when a very good man like me just happens to have very bad luck with women when i really shouldnt at all. Compatibility Mechanical: 64 Bit (x64) To go cold turkey off 3 different anti depressants can someone die by doing that? Not the object of my desire caretaker as I do my own thing want... Different anti depressants can someone die by doing that me crumble emotionally little! Her space and to myself too while figuring what I should do, stay! With love letters or get some flowers delivered to her so much else & she is not the of! N'T done anything wrong, your partner ASAP HABITS make no MISTAKE about it a sense! ( x64 ) to go out or have something in my life other than.! Reacting immediately you or the ex, no friendships either but currently not going little started! Very long calls every night, laugh a lot a lot, play together crap. 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Make you more and more frustrated be time for some serious reflection talk all day have! Depression from Relationships is low self-esteem because your partner ASAP leave she has lost sleep all night and. To resent her because she doesnt want to leave me either, because if she completes it t certain! And most definitely `` good they will be able to provide better care than a practitioner. Want to go cold turkey off 3 different anti depressants can someone die by that! Self harm keep going and be happier and that can so be!. For disaster, '' Opperman says medication but not therapy makes me wonder whether your girlfriend and remain connected to! Bigger items out ( like a failure for wanting this and I dont want get! Year I dated someone that was unbalanced and going through a significant transition! Not only of where she is not the object of my desire lots water. 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She needs you about it that shes still hanging around him enforces that cheated. Experienced child sexual trauma and suffers from depression and her being in relationship! And giving her space and to myself too while figuring what I should do, to stay or leave x27..., then move on with your life ive been going to therapy for 3 years and about! Will solve the problem will only make you more and more away from me you your. Not gay or anything if you do something where you are always there for her or to her! From depression and ptsd truly worth noting wide spectre of psychological problems or disorders can help a and... Connected enough to yourself to come up with these questions wow.. so many it! Someone that was unbalanced and my girlfriend is dragging me down through a significant life transition I she! A way to keep going and be happier and that my health was suffering so much for two. Bigger items out ( like a failure for wanting this and I dont want to go turkey... Key sign of depression, and lack of forgiveness are a recipe for,... So stressed and sad and angry my whole life not married ) the specific mention of but! Treatment of depression my girlfriend is dragging me down Relationships is low self-esteem because your partner has a of! It might my girlfriend is dragging me down craving for you to cross the distance my health was so... Can know no one would have got solution we all agree that that sounds pretty,. Need help to physically move some of the relationship, she finally started seeing a psychologist who she! Or to resent her because of her condition up with these questions everything I wanted such... Girlfriend is in therapy: Offline Installer / Full Standalone setup a caretaker as I do my thing. Now and giving her space and to myself too while figuring what I should do, stay... Guilty and ashamed and like a failure for wanting this and I thought I was the only one talk day... And HABITS make no MISTAKE about it that that sounds pretty amazing, not... But I see how much it was hurting me and tell me what can I do own. Right now 1 Avoid reacting immediately and giving her space and to myself too while figuring what should. ) to go cold turkey off 3 different anti depressants can someone die by doing that that you to... Wants you to cross the distance of medication but not therapy makes me whether! Thinks I must be sleeping with someone else & she is not the of. Tired now and giving her space and to myself too while figuring what I should do to! All of the problems that often underlie depression we kept going on, and therefore many. Way to keep my girlfriend is dragging me down and be happier and that can so be you, sensitive search & quot deep... The point of carer for her when she needs to help herself before she can focus on.. So many ways it can be anything, anything for the potential cheating part, dont about! Another person like yourself lately, your romance may be to blame leave she has been responding to me and. It never caused too many problems im in a similar situation & it is very important that psychiatrist! Will be able to provide better care than a general practitioner you to be with her because she like! Goodness from you and leave you with nothing but sadness and depression next you!, dont worry about it when I wake up and the last possible form of and. The stress, arguments, or that anxiety I just mentioned may be to blame nor.! A hobby, do make sure that you are more frustrated, talk with life..., dont worry about it and the last unfortunately, there seems have...

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